I should have posted this a long time ago:
The article doesn’t say that they dropped from the ceiling, threw a bunch of throwing stars, and disappeared in a puff of smoke. Not really. They were idiots with guns. Ninjas don’t have guns. Haven’t they ever seen real ninja movies, like American Ninja 1-5 and Beverly Hills Ninja? Ameteurs.
Those bitches try to rob me, I’m going to fight them off with 10 different kitchen implements.